I wrote this last year. I actually put into words something I hadn't spoken about in 10 years. It still holds truth for me. I'm actually allowing my Eldest to tell the story if she wants, but the school isn't really doing a memorial or anything, just a moment of silence and going on with life. I present it here again. I can rise above my family's monumental blunder and because I KNOW she won't apologize for it, I will. I'd go up to every one of those families and apologize if I could. I can't. 11 years on, we are winning the war on terrorism just by getting up out of bed and going on with life.
We will go on.
This is the 10th year anniversary of 9/11. It's a pretty big deal, both in America and abroad. I remember watching the news that day. I had walked down to my in-laws place and thought they were watching a TV action movie, but they quickly told me no, a plane had crashed into one of the towers at WTC, then as we watched GMA, we actually SAW the second plane fly into the other tower! It was then we started to realize things would never be the same. I felt Junior kick me in the bladder, and wondered what kind of world I was going to bear my son into. It was so sad, seeing the scared, the worried, the hopeless jump out of the windows of the WTC rather than die a fiery death. We weren't alone though, the world denounced the terrorists and everyone who supported them. One of my most touching memories from that week was of the Buckingham Palace Royal Marching Band playing the Star Spangled Banner to support our grieving country.
Almost everyone in the US had a connection to those who perished that day and in the days following. I didn't know anyone personally. Then came the news. I was connected,.... in a serious, sinister way....
I have never really told this story. Once it was told to me, I was sworn to not impart it to ANYONE. It was going to STAY a family secret, however Eldest had a report to do this year, and she joined journalism class, and OMG.... she was asking questions, so many many questions. So I spilled.
My older sister, in a money grubbing move, married an Egyptian National for $50,000 so he could get a green card and secretly establish himself as a base of operations on Florida's East coast for Al-Qaeda terrorists.
I haven't spoken, thought, or typed those words in 10 years.
My older sister could very well be responsible for aiding in the deaths of THOUSANDS of Americans!! OMG!! How does one reconcile with that?? I'm trying very hard not to bawl my eyes out typing this. Children died that day. Mothers and fathers died that day. Sisters, brothers, heroes.... all died that day, and my own flesh and blood helped those lousy bastards get a toe hold here in America to do this horrible thing. Her "husband" was later targeted by the US government(rather quickly) and my sister was put on notice she better get a lawyer. After that, I never spoke to her again. From what I gather, she wasn't sent to jail, but apparently a hefty fine and probation was levied for fraud in order to obtain a green card.
I explained this to my daughters and son on Tuesday, a catch in my throat, tears in my eyes. Eldest thought she had the story of a lifetime till I told her she wasn't allowed to write about it, but then I thought why keep the secret any longer?
So... I'm not. I am directly related to someone who helped the terrorists commit the most horrible atrocity our country, nay... THE WORLD has ever seen!
And I'm sorry. I know it's not my fault, and I didn't do it myself, but I'm so, so sorry.