Dear Pick Up Line Parents:
I find it commendable that you arrive 45 minutes early for elementary school pick up. It is also awesome that you have such a rapport with your little group that you gather together OUTSIDE of your cars to chatter like magpies and cackle. I also commend you on wanting to meet your little ball of sunshine as they return from another day of learning. Really, all that is just swell, but I just have one suggestion for you...
QUIT BLOCKING EVERYONE ELSE!
I'm sorry, but if you have to get out of your car and help your little darling into their seat in your car, just do the rest of us a favor and park your car in the lot and walk over to get your kid. Some of us have other schools to get to in a timely manner. I also get to the pick up line 45 minutes early, but because of the reason that I have to be at Eldest's school 15 minutes after this school lets out, so really, having to wait 5-10 minutes as you get out of your car, walk over to your kid, open the passenger door & put your kid in, then go and get back in yourself. It's just stupid. If it was only one parent doing it, that would probably also be ok, but it's not. There are several parents who do this and all that farting around adds up to me being late. I just want to throw something at them. It is just so inconsiderate to the rest of us.
So, in conclusion, don't be a jerk. Stay in your car & let the Safety Patrol help your kid in. If that doesn't sound reasonable or you just want to be a hands on picker upper, please park your car in the lot. Don't fuck up pick up line for the rest of us poor souls who have to be somewhere else on time.