There is the distinct possibility I may go to jail in the next few weeks. Let me explain...
Eldest is 14. She has successfully navigated middle school and is on to high school in the fall. Also, aside from a few bumps here and there.... she is a pretty good kid. So recently she has made a couple of requests. One was for a Facebook. The other was for a bikini.
OH SWEET JEBUS WHAT AM I THINKING!!!???
OK, here's my thinking. I am a big fan of social media. I am also an adult. I have seen so many many stories in the news about how kids bully the shit out of each other even more online than in person. We have all heard about the little girl who hung herself in her closet after a schoolmate's mother faked a MySpace profile from a boy then humiliated the poor child! I don't want that to happen to my child. I'd like her to be happy and carefree!
So we were at the pool today where Eldest brought up the two previous items yet AGAIN. I had been brushing her off for a while now so I thought I'd ask her a question... "If you had to choose, which would you prefer, FB or a bikini? Mom's nerves & heart can only take one." I really expected her to choose the FB option, I really did. Unfortunately for me, she piped right up with, "I wanna bikini!"
DAMN! DOUBLE DAMN!!
So, I kept my word and I was gnashing my teeth in the Tar-jay swimwear department on Tuesday night, watching my 14 year old daughter pick and choose between bikini options! GOD HELP ME! We laid down a few rules, like no string bikinis, no t-backs, and no overly decorated options that will fall apart after a day. She gets 3 different options, we go try them on, I take photos so I can go show HHH because he has to have a say in it(and she won't go outside the dressing room), and we finally pick one.
Now, the first time some jackass, pedobear even tries to look at her in a salacious manner, I'm gonna go to jail for fucking him up. It's that roller girl rage. I hope I can get bailed out of jail should it come to that.
So what would you guys pick? If you had a 14 year old daughter, would you give her Facebook, or a bikini?
See ya'll in the lock up! ;-)