Friday, July 31, 2009

Spell Check That Sh%t!

Aunt Flo has come for her usual visit and I am a little beat today. I didn't take to much on today, but I did go out and help my last team clean a house this afternoon, so I was a little tired from that. I also went to our soon to be new apartment complex and handed out coupons and flyers for the business at their "Back To School" party. I know that when school goes back in, the Mom's will be busy and maybe we can get a few biweekly customers. I know when we move I am going to put our place on biweekly service! I'm never home to clean anymore!

One of the semi-bright points of today was the answers I was getting to the ad I put on Craislist for a new person to work with us. I know people are desperate now a days, but some of these replies I have gotten are amazing. I got one response from a woman who just moved here from Caracas. Another one didn't have a lick of cleaning know how. I don't knock those people. They had excellent resumes' and spell check. The rest of the people...... whoo! One person told me, and I quote..."I am unterestd in the position you advertiment on your ad." No lie! The rest of the applicants were just as bad. I know that if they are replying by computer, there is a spell check. Come on people. Don't sabotage your chances at employment with a bad reply!!

Then I was trying to call the people that looked good on the replies and ran into another problem. I waited till 9am to start calling people. I thought that was a good time to start calling. It's when most normal businesses start their day. Just because I'm in the office at 7:30am doesn't mean the rest of the world is! OMG! Either I got people who were asleep and belligerent or just had their phones shut off and didn't bother to call back. WTF?? This is a time in the country's economy where such missed opportunity can be drastically detrimental to their future!! Are they nuts?? I put on Facebook that I was getting these incredulous replies to my calls and Chris commented that she couldn't believe it! I couldn't either. I guess people were just trying to pad their unemployment paperwork.

So for Saturday, the kids and I are on our own. HHH is going fishing with his dumbass brother and also his Dad. I think I'm gonna go get doughnuts in the morning and relax for the day. Might even go to the beach with the kids! Or shopping... you never know!

I love the weekend!

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Baaaaaad Ju-Ju.

Ever been in a place, like a house, or a store, or even somewhere outside, and gotten the heebie jeebies? You know, that slightly uneasy, skin crawling feeling? With the amount of houses I go into now, it was bound to happen.

We have a bad ju-ju house.

I first went in the Bad Ju-Ju house back when I first started working for the company. It is a large home that is also used as an office for a mangement company on Siesta Key. It has 3 bedrooms on the two upper levels, 3 bathrooms throughout the house, and large open rooms on the main level. You would think with the open design of the house, it would be all light and airy feeling, but it isn't. It's filled with old antiques from Russia. There is a nesting doll there that has no less than 50 individual pieces. There are old large pieces of wood furniture. Heavy bedroom pieces, large desks, and breakfronts. It all seems oppressive.

Then there are the crystals. There are tons of handmade, hanging crystals all over every single room, from the bathrooms to the offices! All of them hanging where they will catch the light and shine into the rooms. The disco effect gives me the creeps.

I am never comfortable in this house. I have been there multiple times, and every single time it feels like someone is following me around. I don't like it, but it's the job, so what ya gonna do, right? Either or, It is a money making house and we do it every two weeks, so odds are I will be going back there in the future.

I just wish the beads would go away.

And by that I mean, every time I clean that house, the very next day I get a crystal bead dropped down the back of my shirt. It isn't big, just the size of the ones I see in the Bad Ju-Ju house's window. When it first started happening, I thought there was a bug crawling down the back of my shirt, only to find the beads. Just one. I wear no jewelry when I work, so it doesn't fall off of anything I am wearing. The damn things just drop down my shirt and drive me crazy!! I am not insane. I am a rational woman.

Who gets heebie jeebies in a weird house full of old ass Russian antiques & crystals and has crystal beads dropped down her shirt the next day.

Maybe I should invite what ever it is to Adam's Halloween party?

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

Excuses.... Excuses....

OMG I am so over everyone's excuses when it comes to work, or rather when it comes to not coming in to work! Remember the other day when someone TEXTED in to me? Oh yes.... some stellar individual texted in to me that they wouldn't be able to come into work due to a throat infection where she couldn't talk. I said OK... bring me dr's note when you get back from the ER she said she was going to. I have yet to see the papers, but was told "Oh just call my Mom. She can vouch for me." Sorry, I don't take mommy's word.
Oh and all the "I'm sick" excuses I have gotten lately! Everything from stomach flu to bronchitis to nose bleeds!! What the hell? I am going to start to ask for Dr notes from everyone! Seems people are only sick on Monday's. Sounds like the cocktail flu to me.

Then there was today. I had the new girl call me all panicked. Seems she was going to ride in with her friend because new girls car was broke down. Only problem was new girl couldn't get a hold of her friend( friend works for us too.). I give friend a call and it seems she is having car trouble too. Oh... and she wasn't going to call me about it till AFTER she was supposed to be in the office. Yeah... thanks chick. So I tell her to keep me informed about her car and I got ready to go out. Personally, I think that call in had less to do with the car and more to do with the fight she had with her boyfriend. Seems every time she has something else she wants to do, she suddenly has "car trouble". Sigh....

So tomorrow, bright and early, I am going to put an ad on Craigslist for more help. I am going to do interviews and I am going to specify that the people must live in Sarasota proper and if you don't have dependable transportation, don't bother. Then, next time I get the old, "My car won't start" excuse, SEE YA!!!!

Mrs. Nice Blondefabulous has left the building!!!

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Where's The Beef?!?

This is Rebecca. She ordered a veggie burger for dinner tonight at Cheeburger Cheeburger. She was feeling all superior and cool while waiting for her non-meat item to come out of the kitchen. Then it did.

OMG! She couldn't stand it! And please don't hate on me all you vegetarians out there. I didn't keep my daughter from ordering the veggie burger and I didn't bad mouth it either. I let her make her own decision when it came to what she wanted to eat.

I have never seen so much ketchup go on a burger in my life. I'll give Rebecca credit though... she powered through almost the whole thing. As she was eating it, she remarked...

"It would have tasted better with bacon on it."

Yeah.... I think so too.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Holy Jebus!!

Honestly that's all I got. Wow. Today was one thing right after another. First I had an employee text in. Yes... not call in.... TEXT in! That was a new one on me! Seems one of the girls has a throat infection or something and she was going to the emergency room for treatment. I asked for proof in the way of Hospital papers. I'm nice, but I'm not stupid. Then I went out and started cleaning and got a frantic call from one of the other girls. Seems she just got a call from her husband's work and her husband fell off a 15 foot ladder onto a concrete floor. (He works in soffits and aluminum.) I had to run and get her, take her back to the office so she could rush to the hospital, then I ran and got HHH to follow me to the job I was at, I dropped off the toaster I was driving, got in the car w/HHH, and had him take me to the to that the other girl would have been doing if she hadn't had an emergency, and I went and finished that job, then I drove all the way to the last job I had with the team I started out with, all to get back to the office at 5:30pm. Then I had to start the paperwork, and end of day crap. Lucky for me, on of my other girls who was waiting on me to get back to the office started the laundry for me! I guess when I treat people nice, they are nice back to me! That'll be another breakfast surprise come Friday morning!
So now I'm tired, my head hurts from all the dust I inhaled today, and I am going to go to be early. Tomorrow promises to be a better day. Only 5 houses all together. I can deal with that.

Sunday, July 26, 2009

PMS-ing And other Dangers.

Yeah, if you didn't notice from yesterday's rant on my upcoming class reunion, I am PMS-ing in a major way! HHH caught a bit of it this morning by way of text and cell. I imagine if I had been on the road, I would have been shooting the bird at the other drivers and calling them all kinds of un christian like names. As it was, I stayed in bed for most of the day, flipping to different movies and skimming over Twitter and Crackbook.
After a while, I got up and started a load of laundry and began to clean up my own room and bathroom. I figured since I cleaned up everywhere else, it was high time I cleaned our place. Plus, my thought was, the more cleaning I do now, the less I'll have to do when we move things out of here.
Oh, and did I mention that in a little over half a month we will be moving out of here? I haven't? Oh how silly of me! In a little over half a month we will be leaving the barrio behind and going out to the Ranch to live. (Palmer, not Lakewood.) I have been as patient as I can. I just can't take all the crazy anymore. The late night music, the getting drunk on the stoop and hollering at passing cars, and the utter disregard for our yard and space. I tried to embrace the culture, but they just don't want us so bye bye......
Oops,gotta run. Night of Champions is on and my daughter wants me to watch it with her.

Friday, July 24, 2009


It's that time again. Time to pull out the yearbooks, reminisce about days gone by, and feel just as inferior as you did when you were 16.

It's Reunion time!

Oh joy! (not) I started getting the emails and MySpace notices and Facebook notices at the first of the year. "Get on the mailing lists!", they admonished me! "Keep us apprised of your reunion plans!", it spouted. "OMG! If you know where someone is that isn't on the mailing list, give us their addy, email, facebook, etc, etc, so we can hound them too!" It hasn't stopped. I understand the reason behind this. This year is our 20 year reunion, and typically for our high school, they maybe get 15 or 20 people coming back to go to that reunion. The 20 isn't a big one like the 10. At the 10, people are just out of college and beginning their lives. They want to show off their new spouses, cars, kids, homes, yadda yadda yadda..... It's a big, "Who's got the best stuff?" contest. I get that. I got it back then to in 1999. This year though, the overachievers that made our class the first one to have prom in the gym by raising money for roll away carpeting, and made us the winning est homecoming float class, (3 years in a row), and the first class to have an actual show where the seniors hand over the school to the juniors at the end of the year that was entertaining, have decided we are also now going to be the class that will have the most people back to the 20 year reunion! Oh goody!

Um... I may have to skip this travesty.

"Oh but WHY, Blondefabulous! Why do you want to skip seeing all the people you went to school with? Why aren't you excited about reliving old times and being back at the old stomping grounds?"

In a word.... sucked.

High school was a big load of suck. I was a band geek. I was an honors nerd. People thought it was funny to make fun of my weight the first two years, and the way I dressed the last two. I was only useful as the butt of jokes and someone to copy homework off of. If there was an in class assignment where people needed me, THAT was when I was popular. I need to relive that? Oh, and the Facebook page! That thing is h-i-larious! The photos are all of the A Crowd and the Jocks! In one from the 10 year reunion, there is a girl in it with the A Crowd I remember as not being popular (like me!) and they completely omitted her name from the caption! Ha!

Then there is the inevitable posturing that will occur. I don't need that either. I'm not a doctor, I'm not a philanthropist. I don't have a hot car or a million dollar house. I clean toilets. Now I tell other people to go clean toilets, but still.... potato, potahto. I was homeless twice in the last two years. Not exactly things I wanna share with the chic that was prom queen even if she'd give me the time of day.

I think people come to these things to see just how far others have fallen. They come to see who became a drunk, who never got out of the podunk they grew up in, and who has the most screwed up life. Negativity I just don't require. People who never gave a damn about who I was back then, so why the hell do you want to pretend to care now? Hmph. That's what I thought...... you don't care.

So anyway, I'm not going. It was kind of them to remember me on the invitation list and all, but I think I will have to decline. I spent the better part of 20 years trying to heal the trauma that was my high school experience, and going back to see the people and the place that made such cratered pockmarks on my soul is just not wise. The past is the past, and it will always be such. I look to the future.... bright and full of promise, like I was on graduation day.

No do overs, please.

Because I Had A Bad Day....

Oh my sweet baby Jebus did I have a doozy of a day today. I thought I was gonna go nuts before it was over with. First my sunglasses broke right before I was out the door for work. Then I get to work and the new girl I just hired has a message on our voice mail saying she is in the hospital with an ovarian cyst the size of a golf ball! Eek! After that things settled down for about an hour and then..... BOOM! I got a call from one of the teams. Seems they have locked the job book, (which contains all of the jobs, directions, & maps) in the first house they were cleaning and now they can't get back in. Great. I call the client, but only got their answering machine. Double great. I tell the team how to get to the next job and I go about making a whole new job book for the rest of the houses they had left. I got over to BFE section of Bradenton and gave them the new job book I made. After that I had to drive all the way back to Sarasota and the office to get the Monday paperwork started. Then I get another call from another team. Seems their third job isn't home. Triple great. No answer on their phone number either, so I tell the team to head back to the office and we'll head over to the last job on time since I can't get that client to move up in time slot. (some clients aren't very flexible.) Then I get ANOTHER call. This one is from a client. The client isn't happy. Team Lost My Book is late getting to her house. OK. I'll check on them and call her right back. I call Team Lost My Book and they say they are close to her house.I call the client back and inform her of the situation. She agrees to wait on them. I thought that was the end of it, but noooooooooooo. 20 minutes later client calls back and she is steaming. The team still isn't there, she is pissed and says she no longer wants our services, thank you very much. Fuck fuck fuckity fuck! The I get a frantic call from Team Lost My Book. They are beyond lost! It seems Hungarian Hurricane not only can't speak English very well,she also can't navigate for shit either! The directions say the home is located near the intersection of Lockwood Ridge and University Avenue. Hungarian Hurricane had them going out to LAKEWOOD RANCH!!! Oh my God! They spent an hour being lost. I tell them the lady just cancelled and to call the next house and see if they can go there early. (They did. See, ... some people are just more flexible).

I gave up and went back to the office to meet up with the other team who had the unexpected cancellation. One of the girls had to leave, so she went home and I went in her place to the last house on their list. On the ride there, I had to call L and tell her we had lost a client. Not exactly a call I was happy about making. I got her voicemail and left the message. Then I went and took out my frustration on the bathrooms in the house! Eventually, L called back and told me not to be too worried. If I called and apologized and the lady still didn't care, maybe she wasn't the kind of client we needed. Now me personally, the only thing a client needs is cash money to pay for the job, but I'm not the owner, so as long as L wasn't all pissed at what happened, I was all good.

Now, after all that mess, it was time to go back to the office to start the laundry, check in all the day's payments, and make the job books for Monday. Wheeeeee! I didn't get home till 5:30 and the whole time I was tweeting that I wanted a multitude of vodka shots. I wasn't kidding. I needed some alcohol BAD!!!!! Instead, I got HHH handing me a wonderful dinner right as I walked in the door, kids who did not bother me until I decompressed, and a hot shower. Oh that is the best after a long rotten day!

So anyway, that was my Friday. How was yours??

Thursday, July 23, 2009

Hell Or Purgatory?

I don't know which one we were in tonight.
It had been a really long day. I was running from one job to another, then to the office to meet the A/C guys, then had to run back out to another job, THEN come back to the office to finish up all the paperwork. Sheesh! It's hard work being the boss! So after a day like that, I was ready to go out and have a nice dinner where there was Happy Hour running 2 for 1 specials. Off to Chili's we went and got there before the dinner crowd. We go up to the hostess and she asks us how many people in our party, we say 5 and it was off to the table.... and there was the problem. We were instantly sent to the "Families with Kids" section.
Now, I have kids. There is no fibbing my way out of that. I love my kids. It's other people's kids I have a problem with. When our family goes out in public, my children know that they are to be seen & not heard, they are to say please and thank you to the servers, and they are under no circumstances to make a scene over anything short of having a diabetic seizure. These instructions are backed up with punishment and there are no if's and's or but's. The problem I run into is my rules are great, but other people don't use the same kind of logic and rules for their children.
So we were sat in the Kiddie section next to a table that had a 1 year old, a 3 year old, and a 6 year old. I guess these were busy people. Anywho, the kids were louder than usual for those that age,mom and dad were ignoring said kids, and the two little girls almost knocked HHH's margaritas off our table. Major party foul. Then there was the other tables.... loaded with two to three kids each. All of them rude, loud, and obnoxious. Then the table with the three kids next to me started wailing at the tops of their lungs. Not exactly what I WANTED TO HEAR! I just wanted to relax.
Now, I want to know why the restaurants sit all the families together. Is it a segregation thing? Keep the singles away from the families? Or is it just easier if they are all in the same section of the restaurant? Either way, I was not amused. I just wanted to drink my drinks, eat my dinner, and not have someone else's child breathing over my plate from the next table. Is that so much to ask?
You can bet that next time we go there, I am asking to be sat in the Adult section.
Have any of you ever been sat in a section that was inappropriate for you family?

Wednesday, July 22, 2009


No, not for me. For HHH. See he has this shoulder piece he got from before he knew me. It was originally an old girlfriends name and his high school football jersey number. Then after he met me and we had been together for a year or two, he tried to get it turned into his mom's name because it was so close to the ex g/f's name( 1 letter off.) The place he got it covered at did a crappy job though, and the ink faded leaving a rather ugly bunch of letters on his left shoulder.

Now, he would like to try and have it covered up again. He went to a new shop that just opened up down the row from our business. The guy there told him to come up with a design or a drawing of what he wants to go over it, and they'd work on it for him. There in lies the rub of it. HHH doesn't know what he wants to get.

He already has the "Bull" pirate ship from TI in Las Vegas with our wedding date underneath it on his other shoulder. He has his initials on his right upper arm too. Now this is where you people come in. We need ideas for HHH. Vegas Landmarks are good. He also likes the Buc's, was in the Navy, and Is fond of fast cars. Typical guy stuff. I told him he should get the Welcome To Vegas sign. Either that or the corresponding ship from TI, the "Song". So come on people.... suggestions? Please?

Oh, and don't suggest my name or our names together. Not gonna invoke that curse, thank you very much!

Tuesday, July 21, 2009


Um.... yeah. I fell asleep while talking to HHH tonight. I am sincerely hoping he doesn't take it as a sign I am bored in bed. Quite the contrary, I looooove what he does in bed! He is my yummy yummy man. I have just been working my ass off trying to do this job well. Today I got to see some of the fruits of my labor.

Today was payroll call in day. I got to turn in the hours for the last pay period. Mine was certainly an eye opener. I had 80 regular and almost 14 OT. Compare that to the 50 hours I was getting in two weeks when I was just cleaning and O-M-G that is basically gonna double my check! Holy crap!

Other than that, Today was a great day. I got to do two estimates that I hope to land those accounts, I took on the tag agency and came out a winner by 50%, (meaning I got one thing done,and one thing denied.), and I was able to get out of the office by 4 pm! I could get used to days like that.

OK, so I'm gonna get a head start on bed time tonight. After America's Got Talent, I am going to bed.

Monday, July 20, 2009

Hi There.

And for your reading enjoyment, and because I was super busy today, here are your Bullets du Jour!
**There was a killer lightning storm this morning. By killer, I mean I was ducking even though I was inside, from the bright flashes and earth shattering thunder. It probably didn't help that they are building a new parking garage two blocks over and the gigantic crane was acting like a lightning rod.
** I had to go and clean another house today. It was OK because it was a guy who is new and I like t go and meet the new clients. Now he's even more impressed that the office manager came and cleaned his house. We won't tell him I used to be just a regular cleaning girl until 2 weeks ago. Let's let him stay impressed.
** At the new client's house, there were two of the fattest Beagles I have ever seen. They were chubby loves that really wanted me to stop dusting and start with the fanny schritches. There also was an adorable Basset Hound that took almost the whole two and a half hours to decide I wasn't so bad. After that, she kept trying to steal my dust mop. Too cute!
** I am on fire when it comes to landing new clients. I have signed 4 in the last two weeks, and I am hoping to sign two more tomorrow. Boss Lady says I am a good luck!
** Speaking of Boss Lady, she and I were on the phone almost all day today. She's in Michigan right now and we can both use the computer at the same time thanks to We were brainstorming where to put the clients who were coming out of the woodwork this week wanting to get cleaned right away! Mondays are NEVER boring.
**I hired my replacement. She is starting tomorrow for training. I can't go with her tomorrow because I have those two estimates in Bradenton, but I am sending her with one of our better team leaders and I will see what she has picked up tomorrow when I go out with her. It'll be good to have that extra person for when someone calls in. (Like what happened today.)
**I really hate it when people try to call in, get shot down, then re-call in with a different problem. A non fixable problem. Like today, a girl called & asked for the day off because someone was coming to move boxes of a former roommates things out of her house. I was already short a person due to a standing day off request so I had to nix that idea due to work I needed to do in the office. Then 15 minutes later, the same girl calls in with a babysitter problem. Uh.... you did this crap last week chickie. I was having a REALLY hard time believing her this time. Her "babysitter" problem seems to be happening EVERY Monday. I am wondering what excuse I am going to get next Monday.
I'm tired.
**The stress from me wanting to do a really good job in this manager position is making my face break out. I feel like I'm 15 again. WTH??!! Where's my damn Clearasil?
**I'm still nibbling on the pork shoulder we smoker this weekend.It was lunch Monday.... and more than likely will be for Tuesday & Wednesday too! Then it's back to fruit and yogurt. I also need to get my butt out and on the bike again. Haven't rode it since I took the manager's job. Need to keep the 25lb weight loss steady and dropping some more.
And that's all I got.

Sunday, July 19, 2009

Smokin' Sundays!

This is my anniversary gift from HHH. It's an electric smoker I have affectionately named R2-D2. Well, you have to admit,..... there is a resemblance. Anyway, we fired up ol' R2-D2 today and smoked a pork shoulder. I seasoned it just like I used to up in Memphis....
OMG! It was KILLING me to smell it all day! There is no better perfume than the smell of wafting smoke from the smoker.

Once it was done it was even better! It was moist and flavorful. I still smell like the smoker. Is it weird that The smell of BBQ turns me on? Yeah.... I thought so. Oh well.
So,.... what did you all have for dinner?

Saturday, July 18, 2009

The Return Of Fluffy.

So as you may have noticed on my Twitter and Facebook, Fluffy came back on Saturday. We were enjoying the morning, HHH was making pancakes for everyone, we were listening to music on the old laptop and then suddenly there was this loud meowing at the back door. We open it up and there was the dirtiest Fluffawuffagus I had EVER seen! He was grey instead of his usual pristine white. He seemed a little thinner and didn't want to come to us at first, But I put on my shoes and went outside and he came over to me. I picked his dirty butt up and took him inside. Now we have to get him cleaned up so he isn't dingy grey anymore.

I'm just glad that he's back.

Just For Fun.

Friday, July 17, 2009

The One Where I Say...

Oh holy Jebus, I survived my first week as office manager.
I want to thank everyone for their words of encouragement and say that it really means a lot to me that you guys have taken the time to read about my nervousness, anxiety, and worry and tried to assuage my feelings. It has been so long since I have had a job where I was orchestrating things that I was worried I wouldn't remember how to do it. Luckily for me, it has been like riding a bike. You just don't forget it.
I have, unfortunately, forgotten to leave comments on all of the blogs I read and keep up with. It's not like I haven't been there reading them. I have been. I have diligently kept up with my Google Reader, I just haven't had time to sit down and formulate good comments. I'm not one of those commenter's that just blurts out every thought that pops into my head pertaining to someone's blog post. I like to read something, digest the meat of the post, then formulate a well thought out, correctly spelled, grammatically correct comment. The new job has kept me so busy (sometimes working 10 hours), that I have made a promise to myself I wouldn't neglect my family. This means getting my butt home by 5:30 and having dinner with the family, showering w/HHH, and watching TV with the kids. It also means writing my blog posts right away and saving it to self post at 11 or 12. All that doesn't leave much time for commenting. Heck, If I didn't wake up at the ass crack of dawn, I wouldn't get to read very many either, but luckily(??) I have been waking up at 5:30 or 5:45am every morning, so I have been reading them then.
Anyways.... what I am trying to say is, I am still around. I'm still here. I haven't gone anywhere. I have just become the "man behind the curtain", so there fore I am spread a little thin.
Oh but it is good to be the boss!

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Alone Again.....

As of 8am on Friday morning, I will be the only person in charge at the office. Yep. Boss Lady had to fly back to Michigan for her other business she runs, (a business coaching endeavor) and I am going to be left in charge for all of next week! Yay for me. I haven't screwed up too terribly this week. Aside from the total crap fest that was Monday, things have been running smoothly. I have gotten the clients taken care of, the schedule done every day, and the money posted to the bank on time. That's all someone can ask isn't it?
Oh, and another cool thing I get to do...... Tweet! I get to twitter on our company account about green facts, what we're doing for the day, and all kinds of fun things! Our Twitter handle is GreenWorldClean and you should add us! Up until now, I haven't been mentioning my business's name, but the cat is out of the bag now. I'm going to @followfriday it tomorrow from work too!
I found a job where I get paid to play on the computer. I love it!
HHH isn't so thrilled. He always made fun of my computer addiction and now that I get paid to be on a computer all day?? He's making fun even more! Ha ha! I don't care. They say find something you like doing and find a way to make money at it right?
And did I mention that I get to drive the Sporty toaster all week next week? It's more awesome than the regular toasters! I love this job!

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Pocket Sized

So, HHH got me a small laptop to take to work. It is the size on my daughter's Harry Potter book. I could fit it in my purse. It is light and 1" thick. I love it!

On the job front, I was out cleaning and then in doing office work today. I landed 2 more clients today. They are only 1 time clients, but we are keeping the contact information so I can check in with them in a month or two. Maybe I can cultivate them into more reliable clients.

On the home front, the cat is gone. It happened a few days ago. I swear Fluffy evolved thumbs cause he has been opening the back door to the deck and two days ago, HHH came in from grilling and the door didn't shut all the way and that cat opened it up when we weren't looking and he was G-O-N-E! We have looked for him and called his , but so far,no Fluffy. The kids are upset sort of, and I keep assuring them that Fluffy is just out finding a girlfriend and he'll be back after he gets bored, but I am wondering if that will be the case. We move in the second week of August and if he isn't back.... we won't be able to come around and find him. I have had Fluffy since he was born. I would hate to lose him.

He has 4 weeks.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

The Office

No, this isn't the one with Steve Carell, but it can be funny. OMG, now that I have recovered from yesterday's fiasco, let me go into it for you.

Yesterday started out simple enough. I had checked the email account all weekend, made sure to check for voice mails, and looked for any kind of cancellations. Nothing was going on. Fine. I go into work at 7:30. Not 10 minutes after I got there, the phone starts ringing and I have clients canceling due to burst pipes, employee's calling in, and vendors calling about product. I ended up running around all day yesterday from Longboat Key to Golden Gate Point and down to Siesta Key! I had to clean places all by myself. It was tiring. It was draining. After it was over, I had to go back to the office and sort out all the paperwork. That kept me at the office till 6 pm and by the time all was said and done, I had put in 10.5 hours for the day. When I got home, I was tired. Beyond tired. I needed HHH to give me a massage and keep me from falling down in the shower. I slept like a rock. I didn't wake up till the alarm went off at 6am.

The next day was the complete opposite. I got to the office early and there were no calls..... no cancellations.... nothing but sweet silence. I got the invoices emailed, schedules done up, clients moved around to their satisfaction, all kinds of things! I was an office machine! (lol, get it?)

Now, I can only hope that tomorrow will be just as good as today was.

Oh, and the funny part? Well, that was when I was looking at the old client list. That's a list of people we no longer have as clients for one reason or another. The legend at the top of the list has a 1 for dissatisfaction, a 2 for moved, and a 3 for $$ problems. There were lots of 1's unfortunately, a few 2's, and a fair amount of 3's. There were a few entries that weren't numbers. The word was written in small script and I had to look really close to see it, but once I did, I burst out laughing. It said "dead".

Um,... so I guess there's no calling those clients and asking if they'd like to try us again at a discount?

Monday, July 13, 2009

Oh My Aching...


I had a whole other blog written, but it erased itself.

Fuck it. After the day I've had.... I ain't trying to re write it.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Evil Is......

.......a boy who sees his sister enjoying a nice float in the pool and can't help himself but ruin it for her! She was really pissed at him when this photo came to it's fruition.

The pool day yesterday went well. We got an early start and when the clouds showed up around noon we were done swimming. After that it was lunch and on to doing some furniture looking. I think I tweeted this too,.... we were looking and not buying because I would have no where to put anything even if we did buy something! We aren't slated to move for another month and that date could not come sooner! Just in this weekend....

**SATURDAY- We were pulling out of our driveway when we saw this cop in an SUVdriving really slowly down our street. Suddenly he screeches to a stop, throws it in reverse, and speeds backwards down the street, does a stunt turn at the intersection so he's facing the way he wants to drive, and hauls ass off down the road! We left on our errands and when we drove past the street again there were 15 cop cars down the road from our house!! WTF?

**SUNDAY- We are coming home from the pool and as we drive down the road to the house, there are 3 cop cars at the other end of the street. We didn't go down to see what it was, but it turns out later when our landlord stopped by, he told us someone had flattened several street signs bashed the transformer boxes there, and kept going. It must have been really messed up for 3 cops to show up for it! Once again... WTF??

I can't wait to move.

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Business Or Pleasure?

Today was a little of both for me. After I woke up at 8:30am, (which is a miracle because my body seems programed to get up at 7 every day), I spent the day lounging around till HHH got home from work at 10. After that we had a few errands to run like going grocery shopping, looking at some furniture for the new apartment, and then I had an errand to run for work. It seems weird to say stuff like that. I spent so much time staying at home or just being one of the cleaners that just thinking about running the office is still new. And, yes, I know I have been saying this in almost every blog post I have written in the last week, but you have to understand it still seems new and weird. I imagine next week when I am in the thick of things and I have made a few mistakes, it will have sunk in, but till then, it all exciting!

Yesterday, after work I took the family out to celebrate our good fortune. We went to Chili's and I had a Mandarin Blush. Much to my enjoyment, it was 2 for 1! So I was a little tipsy for the evening. Then we went to Old Navy and I got some new pants for work. After losing all my weight, I didn't have any office wear. I got a couple of pairs of khaki pants and some new shirts. Now I will look nice in the office. I'm in trouble if I lose any more weight though. I guess I'll just buy a belt!

Tomorrow(Sunday) I am going to go to the pool with the kids and just relax. There aren't any pressing emails on the office account and no one has called in for Monday yet, so we should be golden for the first day of me running the joint.

Now, if I could just get these butterfly's out of my damn stomach!

Friday, July 10, 2009

Who's The Boss?

I am, That's who!

I am officially taking over as of 5 o'clock today. I have the keys to the office, I have the answering service number, and I have the office email accounts. Before I left work today, I set up all the books for Monday, I logged in all deposits, emailed invoices & estimates, and authorized credit cards. I got the laundry started, mixed chemicals for next week, and then locked up for the night.

So now on Monday, I need to make sure everything is still a-ok by checking the email and voice mail, and I will be on my way into office manager-land!

Thursday, July 9, 2009

What's Big, Orange, & Can Squash Your Foot?

Amber that's what! In case you're wondering, Amber is a big orange tabby that looks like Morris the Cat on steroids! He weighs 25 lbs. He is declawed on the front paws. He thinks he is a lap cat. At 25 lbs, think I would lose the feeling in my legs if he sat in my lap for very long!! He is a sweetheart though. Unfortunately, if he wants your attention, he will either come up and rub on your leg, which can cause you to fall if you aren't expecting it, or he will wrap his paws around either your arm or leg and he won't let go. I mean really WON'T let go. This is a strong cat, and of course the people are home and going, "Aww how cute! He likes you!", meanwhile I am thinking, "Let go so I can work.". Today the clients let Amber out of the house twice and I had to get him. ALL 25 lbs of him. The second time was funny too, because the little old man accidentally let Amber out, so he got a baggie of cat treats and was shaking them right outside the front door, calling here kitty kitty kitty. The cat was sitting right behind him just staring with an expression that said, "Dude,... I'm behind you." I was trying so hard not to laugh.

We deal with quite a few pets when it comes to the cleaning business. Cats, dogs, birds,.... you name it. Last week we almost got bowled over by a herd of Mini Pinschers. There were 6 of them in one house! It's funny how some of these owners are too. They have the bags of food that are all expensive and "special", and they have all kinds of pet vitamins and supplements. Its funny. I wonder how much money they blow on that stuff, and if the dogs and cats really like it. Some of that food looks like yard gravel.

Then today our last customer sent Fluffy some cat toys. Some of those feathers on a wand thingy's for Fluffy to play with. The lady is really nice and she has two Scottish Fold cats. They're the ones that look like they have no ears. Actually, all the animals on our routes are pretty nice. The only ones that are crappy are the pair at this magazine publisher's house. They are huge and they will eat you.

I'll stick to the 25 lb cats, thank you very much!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009


That's what I worked today. Total. I would have had a normal day, but the customer from hell decided to mess that up for me. I'll explain....

See, I was leading a team today. Erika and I had 3 houses spread across Sarasota. We did the first two, no problems. They were houses we had done before so we know what to expect. The third house was one we had never been to before. It was one JJ had taken over the phone and subsequently no one had ever been to the place. The notes on the order page didn't say anything about needing a key or doors being left open, so we rang the bell and waited. And waited. AND WAITED. No one came to the door. OK. I call the contact number for the woman and get a voicemail. I leave my # and then call JJ. JJ tries to call the lady too and gets nothing as well. We wait at the house for 30 minutes for someone to show up, but still don't see anyone, so we leave. I put a company card in the woman's door and off we go to the office.
We get to the office and I start on the paperwork and then the phone rings. It's the no show customer. She say's, "Oh, my front door is open. They should have gone in." WTF lady! There was no notes saying the door was going to be open. I had tried the front door and it was stuck shut. The lady then goes on to say.."Oh. My door sticks shut all the time." Bitch please! So I load all my crap back up in the toaster and head back out there, and let me tell you, the damn place was in BFE! So I go back out there and clean the place. It was covered in tons of dust. Oh, and dog hair. It sucked ass. I got that done and motored back to the office. By then it was 5pm! By the time I got the payroll done, the job books completes, and the checks written up for deposit in the morning, it was 5:30! I was tired! I called HHH to come get me in the car. No way I was riding home. I was beat!

Lucky for me, those kinds of days are few and far between. I am going to get a net book or a small computer so I can bring it to work with me and then get some of the software for work put on it and bring it home with me. I don't think that will happen often. I guess this is that "trial by fire" thing people talk about.

Gotta keep my fanny from getting crisped!

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

And Now For Something Completely Different!

The Larch.

Ha, yeah.... had to put in some Monty Python after that title. But really, today was completely different at work. I went in at 7:30am, which is different because they have been bringing us girls in at 8:30, 9, or 9:30am. I got there and JJ instantly started explaining what was going on, what needed to be done, and what I could do. I took notes and compared the jobs in my mind to what I had done in the past at the other management positions I had been in. I'll say one thing.... I may not like sitting in an office all day. I was fighting to keep from yawning, but then that could have been because the cat decided to play the "Knock shit around & meow loudly" game. Fucker. Always when I need to get up early, too.... never when I can sleep in. Double fucker.

So, the day went by without a hitch. At one point in time, JJ left to run an errand, L also left for a meeting, and I was at the office doing the paper work JJ had showed me an hour earlier and then doing the deposits, entering it all in quickbooks, setting up the job books for the next day and getting all the laundry started. When JJ got back from her errand she was happy to see I had caught on so much on the first day. I found out why a little later too.

JJ is gone as of this coming Friday!

Yep. I have exactly 4 days to learn all the ropes in the office and get them down enough that I can run the office by myself on Monday. Me. Hmmm... I wonder why they didn't tell me this earlier. I may have to take my trusty bottle of Vodka with me! As it is, all donations of coffee will be accepted because I need to stay awake and motivated. I jumped over several people who had been at the company at least a year longer than I had for this job and I mean to do it and do it right! I don't wanna look like a slacker.

When L is in Michigan, I am the boss now. I will be drunk with power! Mwah ha ha ha ha!

Nah.... that's just not my style. Maybe I'll just bring fresh flowers to the office instead.

Monday, July 6, 2009

Yay Me!

I have news everyone! Good news. The best kind of news. NO I am not pregnant you sadists, so get that idea out of your head!!!!! Honestly, the nerve of some people! No my news is about work, namely my work at the green cleaning company. Remember back when I said I was going to get a team leader position because one of my co workers was going to be the new office manager? Yeah, that fell through. Seems my co worker was worried that she couldn't handle the job and she was worried that she was going to spend too much time away from her family, so she turned it down last Thursday. ENTER: Me! Over the weekend HHH was talking to me and we discussed that the kids were getting older and more responsible so if I wanted to take on more responsibility at work, he'd be OK with it. Alrighty then. First thing this morning, I went to JJ, the office manager at the moment, and asked if it was OK if I threw my hat in the ring for the job. O!M!G! JJ was ecstatic! She instantly called L the new owner and told her that I wanted to be the manager. L was ecstatic too! She was up in Michigan but was getting on a flight to come to Sarasota so we set up a time to talk when her flight landed later that afternoon.
We cleaned all morning and around 1pm got back to the office where I talked to both L and JJ. The job doesn't sound too terrible. Basically it is organizing, scheduling, and estimating jobs. I can handle that. I ran a whole restaurant before. I ran a kitchen and deli before. Hell, I ran my own cleaning business before! All I have to do is learn the computer system they have. That might be a little difficult because it was set up by J, my old boss who is Hungarian and it is fraught with misspellings, incorrect addresses, and wrong phone numbers. L and JJ have been working on this and are in the process of making a master book of hard copy, CORRECT information. Other than that little tidbit.... everything should be hunky dory.

So, that's my news. Awesome isn't it? Oh, and the extra$3.50 an hour plus profit sharing is a nice bonus too.

Green is the new black!

Sunday, July 5, 2009


Man, I just cannot believe how much this weekend wore me out! Between the idiot drivers, Universal, and the kids, I am just tuckered out! I started out driving home today, but had to switch off halfway home because I was having trouble keeping my eyes open. Really. I was sleepy and drowsy and in the traffic we were driving in it was not recommended that I keep driving in that condition. We didn't even do a whole lot. We did a few rides at the parks, saw the fireworks, and basically did a whole lot of nothing.

Who knew nothing was so damn something??

And now the neighbor's to the rear of me are being all white trash and Jerry Springer. When I got home today, I started all the laundry from our weekend away. As I was hanging up the first load on the line, I hear female voices from over the fence....

"I said I wanna talk to Leroy right da-yum now bitch. This don't con-CERN you."

"Well, I'm not waking him up so you have to come back later. He been up all night drinkin' and I ain't gonna wake him."

" Bitch, this don't concern you none you f***-ing crack whore. I'm his baby's mama and I SAID I need to talk to him!"

And it just went down hill from there. Right now I am hearing intermittent "BANG" noises from back over there. I am hoping that it is a car backfiring, but I think it's a shotgun blast. So I have the choice of thinking baby mama #1 is blowing away baby mama #2, or someone in that whiskey soaked hell hole is inebriated and playing with a large firearm. I can't wait to move!!! I think I'll make one of those count down thingy's just to mark the occasion!

In the mean time, I'll just eat banana pudding and watch Paul Blart: Mall Cop.


Happy 4th of July everyone.
Please remember, our freedom isn't free. Thank a soldier.

Stay safe this weekend.

Friday, July 3, 2009

Why Don't We.....

So, for my birthday, we have gone to Universal again. It was awesome.... well except the part where people were trying to kill me while we were driving over there! I kid you not... people were cutting each other off, zipping from lane to lane, and almost rear ending each other. It was chaos. Oh, and the cherry on top was a guy going south in the north bound land 500 feet from the entrance to our hotel!!! Oh my fuck! And then HHH didn't even notice that the guy was on OUR SIDE of the road. I needed liquid tranquilizers stat!
Enter Margaritaville! After 2 margaritas, I was feeling better. Then I found out that Margaritaville has a gluten free menu! SUPER!!!! We ate and then the waitress came out with a Chocolate Hurricane that was gluten free as well! OMG I was in heaven!
It was,...... wait for it....... awesome! I and my new hair cut rocked the night. Then we went back to the hotel to watch a movie and rest up for tomorrows 4th of July festivities!
I say 37 will be a good year, and if not. Fuck it. I look hot!

Thursday, July 2, 2009

A Moving Blog Post.

That, dear friends, is where we will be moving in the second week of August. It is so pretty, and no loud mariachi music as far as I can tell.

We will be in the Majestic, on the ground floor, in the back, by the lake. (run on sentence much?) You have seen the pool, now here's the place the pool is at. I'm excited. It means a LOT more room for us. This house we are in is OK, but we just have too much damn stuff even with the downsizing we did.

If you want to read more about it, here's the web addy.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Just Another Day.

Today's (aka Thursday) Schedule

1. Go to work at 9:30am

2. Hopefully work until 3 or 4 pm.

3. Come home.

4. Hopefully do some laundry. (Please Mr. Sun!)

5. Make dinner.

6. Go to HHH's work and clean an apartment for his complex because their housekeeper is on vacation till next Wednesday.

7. Come home. (again.)

8. Shower & get jammy-ified.

9. Go to sleep.

Sounds pretty good to me!