Friday, May 22, 2009


Cat splatter.

Think about it. What the hell is it? How the hell do you get it everywhere? Why the hell does your lazy ass live with it for weeks at a time until you finally have to call in a cleaning service to take care of the problem?

Cat splatter.

I had to clean cat splatter today. I thought yesterday's indignity of emptying a large can of adult diapers was bad....... today was worse. What made it even better was the fact that my boss only gave my partner and I 1 1/2 hours to clean this lady's condo. It did not bode well for us. First of all, it was a first time cleaning. The first time a service comes to clean for you, it takes a little longer because you've obviously let a few, (if not all) things go for quite a while. It will take a little extra time to reign these things in, like dusting all of the blinds both front AND back, i.e.- not just the parts you can see, but all of the blinds. Oh, and detailing your refrigerator, both inside and out. Basically, all the crap you never feel like doing, we do. An hour and a half was NOT enough time to do all this because, on top of what my boss asks us to do, this woman left a 2 PAGE letter, detailing what she would like us to do on top of that. Part of that list was "Please remove all cat splatter from the walls. It tends to build up." Um.... no shit!(She owns 4 cats and one dog, and none of them looked any too healthy.) I don't even want to know what the hell the cat is doing that it is splattering all over the walls!!! (it was brown in color.)

To make the job even better, my Boss showed up with the new Manager to see how it was going. It wasn't going well, and then they started nit picking. I had been fighting with the cat splatter and wasn't even remotely done, but there they were, criticizing the job. Um, it was your bright idea to only give us 1 1/2 hours to do this cluster f*ck of a job, remember? Finally they sent us on to our next job, 20 minutes late because of the mess we were trying to deal with. As we were leaving I heard the parting comment of "You go ahead, we'll fix your mistakes."

Um..... f*ck you very much. Give me enough time and I'll have everything finished next time. Thanks and have a pleasant day.

So now I am sitting here, writing about cat splatter and thinking about going to Universal tomorrow to make me feel better...... oh and taking the family with me. That would be super!

Maybe I just need a stiff drink.

Cat splatter. I may never recover!

1 comment:

phinz said...

You are awesome in my book for even being able to SAY "cat splatter" without gagging, let alone deal with it.

It was a test by the boss to see how you'd react to negative feedback in a crunch situation. You rawk!